PLEASE NOTE THAT QURAN-E-HAKIM.COM HAS A HOME PAGE BUT FOR SOME OBSCURE REASON IT IS NOT ALWAYS DISPLAYING PROPERLY ON THE INTERNET. IT APPEARS TO WORK CORRECTLY ON MOBILE PHONES, BUT NOT ON DESKTOPS. THE LINK IS'HOME'.
IT SHOULD BE OPENING TO A PAGE WHICH AFTER THE BISMILLAH READS: 'All praise and all glory belongs to Allah (Subhanahu wa ta’ala - glory be to Him, the Most High), Rabbil-alamin (the Lord of the Worlds), Ar-Rahman (the Most Gracious), Ar-Rahim (the Most Merciful), Maliki yawmid-din (Master of the Day of Judgement), Al-Alim (the All-Knowing), Al-Hakim (the All-Wise) ...' BUT IT DOESN'T. IT OPENS TO ANOTHER PAGE.
My name is Ian Charles
Calderwood. I was born in Newcastle, New South Wales, Australia, on
the 11th of January 1946, but was raised in Melbourne.
I reverted to Islam as a Sunni
Muslim who follows the Hanafi Mazhab (School) in Melbourne in 1983.
In my youth I hadn’t believed in the
Trinity and it was that rejection of the Trinity that caused me to eventually reject
Christianity and try to find my way through the seemingly endless choices I
faced about religion.
I want to stress that it was only by Allah’s Grace (Subhanahu wa ta’ala - Glory be to Him, the Most High); (Tabāraka wa-taʿālā - Blessed and Exalted [is He]); (‘Azza wa-jall - Prestigious and Majestic (is He)] and by His Grace alone that I had questioned the doctrine for years - I make no claim to righteousness.
Obviously, Allah (Subhanahu wa ta’ala - Glory be to Him, the Most
High) knew my dilemma about
religion, a dilemma that was exacerbated by the fact that I faced some serious
crises on occasions in my life, and in His Grace, he opened my heart and my mind
to the truth, firstly with a dream and later with a Wahy (inspiration) about
the Qur’an, that eventually led me to embracing Islam in 1983.
After I reverted, I changed my name on
the 28th of October 1984 by Deed Poll (registered number M110855) in Melbourne from Ian Charles Calderwood
to Yahya Abdullah. I lived in Pakistan under that name, working as a journalist
for most of the time, from April 1985 until I returned to Melbourne in
The Law Handbook 1996, published by the
Fitzroy Legal Service, also explains on Page 324 that Deed Polls were abolished
in Victoria effective from the 01st of November 1986. It notes: “While you may
use a deed poll as evidence of a change of name, you cannot now use a deed poll
to administratively register a change of name. With effect from 1 November
1986, a change of name can only be registered by making an application to the
Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages on the prescribed form . . .”
EDITED WITH MINOR CHANGES AT LAKEMBA,
NSW. 23 August 23
EDITED WITH EXTENSIVE CHANGES AT
LAKEMBA, NSW. 24 August 23
AT ONE STAGE, THE
QURAN-E-HAKIM.COM WEBSITE WAS NOT PUBLISHING CORRECTLY SO THIS PAGE WAS
PUBLISHED ON QURAN-E-HAKIM.NET ON 24 FEBRUARY 2023.
LATER, ON THE 01 APRIL 23, WHEN
QURAN-E-HAKIM.COM WAS DISPLAYING CORRECTLY, I RESTORED THIS PAGE TO THE SITE.
I TOOK DOWN THE QURAN-E-HAKIM.NET
WEBSITE IN JUNE 2023 WITH THE INTENTION OF REBUILDING THE SITE USING WORDPRESS
– I BELIEVED THAT THE LATTER WOULD GIVE ME GREATER FLEXIBILITY RATHER THAN THE
STANDARD DIY TEMPLATE THAT I HAD BEEN USING.
INSHAA-ALLAH, I STILL INTEND TO REBUILD
THE SITE BUT IT WILL BE A WHILE YET. I SUFFER FROM VARIOUS ILLNESSES AND THEY
TEND TO UNDERMINE MY EFFORTS.
ONE ISSUE THAT PEOPLE SIMPLY DO NOT
UNDERSTAND IS THAT I SUFFER FROM AN ANXIETY DISORDER. I HAVE HAD IT SINCE I WAS
A YOUNG MAN AND IT CAN BE A NIGHTMARE. IT IS NOT A FORM OF PSYCHOSIS – IT IS AN
EMOTIONAL DISORDER THAT PROBABLY STEMS FROM ARGUMENTS I HAD WITH MY FATHER
ABOUT MY MOTHER.
HE COULD, AS ALLAH WELL KNOWS, BE A
MOST UNPLEASANT PERSON AND HIS TREATMENT OF HER WAS UTTERLY CONTEMPTIBLE. SOME
MEN SIMPLY DON’T APPRECIATE ALLAH’S BLESSINGS. GOD GIVES THEM RIGHTEOUS
WIVES AND LOVING CHILDREN AND THEY THINK THAT BECAUSE THEY HAVE GONE UP IN THE
WORLD THAT THEY CAN BEHAVE ANY WAY THEY PLEASE.
THEY FORGET IT WAS GOD WHO RAISED THEM
UP IN THE FIRST PLACE – WHO BLESSED THEM WITH SUCCESS AND PROSPERITY - AND IT
WAS HE WHO BLESSED THEM WITH A FAITHFUL WIFE AND LOVING CHILDREN.
THEY FORGET THAT UNLESS HE FORGIVES
THEM THEY CAN FACE A TERRIBLE DAY OF RECKONING. THERE IS NO ESCAPE. HE DOES NOT
TAKE LIGHTLY THE ABUSE OF WOMEN – THE ABUSE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS.
MY BELOVED ALLAH (Subhanahu wa
ta’ala - Glory be to Him, the Most High); (Tabāraka wa-taʿālā -
Blessed and Exalted [is He]); (‘Azza wa-jall - Prestigious and Majestic (is
He)] NEVER FORGETS AND IF IT PLEASE HIM NEITHER DO I.
THE ANXIETY DISORDER POSES MAJOR ISSUES
FOR ME AND IS INVARIABLY TRIGGERED BY STRESS – INCLUDING HARASSMENT. I MANAGE
IT BY DHIKR, MEDITATION, DRIVING AND SLEEPING.
IT CAN CAUSE ME TO MISS PRAYERS OR
BEHAVE IN OTHER WAYS THAT SOME MAY THINK IMPIOUS. FOR EXAMPLE, I FIND SOME
MUSIC SOOTHING – IT CAN HAVE A CALMING EFFECT – BUT AS EVERYONE KNOWS
MUSIC IS HARAM IN ISLAM.
ANOTHER EXAMPLE: IF I FAIL TO GO TO THE
MOSQUE OR FAIL TO PRAY IT DOESN’T MEAN I’M LEAVING ISLAM OR THAT I’M REJECTING
ALLAH. IT JUST MEANS I’M IN TURMOIL AGAIN AND I’M QUITE ALL RIGHT AS LONG AS HE
IS THERE TO NURTURE ME AND COMFORT ME.
IF I RESORT TO PRACTICES SUCH AS
LISTENING TO MUSIC, THEN I WISH SOME PEOPLE WOULD LEARN THAT IT IS MY BUSINESS
AND ALLAH’S BUSINESS – HE KNOWS ONLY TOO WELL HOW SICK I CAN GET – AND LEAVE ME
THE CONTINUAL PRESSURE ON ME TO RETURN
TO PAKISTAN HAS HAD APPALLING CONSEQUENCES – I WOULD NEVER GO THERE AGAIN - AND
ALLAH KNOWS ONLY TOO WELL WHY.
IT DOESN’T MEAN I DISLIKE THE PAKISTANI
PEOPLE OR THAT I’M REJECTING THE RELIGION – IT JUST MEANS THERE ARE SERIOUS
MATTERS THAT REMAIN UNRESOLVED.
I’M FACING DIFFICULTIES IN DECIDING
WHETHER OR NOT TO GIVE EVIDENCE ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED DURING THE YEARS I LIVED IN
PAKISTAN AND IT IS ALLAH WHO WILL RESOLVE THOSE PROBLEMS FOR ME.
HE DOESN’T NEED ANY HELP FROM
IMPRUDENT, IGNORANT PEOPLE WHO DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE ENORMITY – THE
CONSEQUENCES – OF ANY COMMENTS I MIGHT MAKE.
BECAUSE IT IS FORBIDDEN IN ISLAM TO LIE
OR DO ANYBODY AN INJUSTICE, I HAVE TO PICK MY WAY THROUGH WHAT I WANT TO SAY –
TAKING CARE NOT TO BREAK ANY OF THE RULES.
DESPITE THE INJUNCTION THAT IT IS HALAL
TO LIE OR PLAY TRICKS IN JIHAD I TRY TO REFRAIN FROM DOING SO. WHETHER A PERSON
IS A MUSLIM OR NOT – EVEN IF THEY ARE AN ENEMY OF ISLAM – I TRY TO SHUN ANY
FORM OF UNTRUTH.
I HAVE NEVER FORGOTTEN THAT YEARS AGO –
WHEN I WAS LIVING IN PAKISTAN – I READ A BOOK BY A SCHOLAR WHO WAS DISCUSSING
THIS VERY ISSUE – WHETHER OR NOT IT WAS HALAL TO LIE IN JIHAD.
THIS SAGE GAVE SOME SOUND ADVICE. HE
SAID WORDS TO THE EFFECT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS HALAL TO LIE IN JIHAD IF
POSSIBLE IT WAS BETTER NOT TO DO SO
MANY OF THE SCHOLARS AGREE AND WARN
THAT EVEN IN CIRCUMSTANCES WHERE IT IS HALAL TO LIE (THERE ARE THREE SUCH
CIRCUMSTANCES IN THE HANAFI SCHOOL) IT IS BETTER TO AVOID DOING SO, BUT RATHER
CHOOSE WORDS THAT ARE TRUE BUT STILL SERVE THE DESIRED PURPOSE.
ONE OF THE KEY ISSUES I AM FACING IS
THAT IF I IDENTIFY ANY MUSLIM WHEN I’M TESTIFYING I HAVE TO AVOID HUMILIATING
THEM OR GIVING THE IMPRESSION THAT I’M SEEKING AFTER THEIR PUNISHMENT.
IF I GO AHEAD AND TESTIFY THEN I’M
SPELLING IT OUT I’M NOT DOING EITHER. I’M ONLY TRYING TO ARRIVE AT THE TRUTH
AND IF MY SUSPICIONS ARE CORRECT THEN THAT COULD BE A HORROR – A DISASTER THAT
MIGHT BE BETTER LEFT UNSPOKEN.
AS SUCH, I WOULD SUGGEST THAT SOME
PEOPLE SHOULD LEARN TO MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS ABOUT THE MATTER OF ME
TESTIFYING. ALLAH IS MY CARER AND MY GUIDE. HE DOES AN EXCELLENT JOB. HE
DOESN’T NEED ANYBODY’S HELP!